Sunday, February 19, 2006

One Thing

The results of our ultrasound were so exciting, but the tech did tell us of one small thing that she found. On our baby's heart ventricles there are some tiny (less than two millimetres) cysts called choroid plexus cysts. She said they are not uncommon and they tend to disappear on their own and that we shouldn't be concerned. I appreciated her telling us the truth, and didn't think too much of it at the time. But then I came home and made the mistake of surfing the internet looking at sites about choroid plexus cysts and how they can be an indication of chromosomal abnormalities. You see, there are several markers that may surface during an ultrasound, things that the tech flags as abnormal. They include: choroid plexus cysts, an echogenic bowel, short femurs, and clenched fists. If a baby has more than one of these markers, they take that as an indication of a potential chromosomal problem like Down's Syndrome or Trismony 18.
I went to bed and tried to put all of my internet research out of mind, but I awoke at three a.m. plagued with fears and doubts and the feeling that our dream for a healthy child was dashed. I began to fret that the ultrasound tech had perhaps found more than just the cysts; what if the baby's femurs were short or the fists were clenched and she didn't want to be the one to break the terrible news to us.
I heard Steve tossing and turning and then whispered to him, "Are you awake?"
He was. I said, "I'm worried about the baby."
Then I cried. And he held me.
When I woke up this morning I called the home of our ultrasound technician (she is a wonderful lady who goes to our church). Yes, I was playing the part of a paranoid first time mom. I asked her if she had found any of the other markers, other than the cysts, and she said no. There was nothing to be worried about. She's had friends whose babies had the same thing and were fine. Her assurance was that our baby was healthy and there were no other problems that she could see.
I feel much better.

Amanda Brown at 8:51 AM



at 9:22 AM Blogger Jen said...

Aw ... Amanda. (((HUGS)))

I was the same way with everything. You want your baby to be perfect and healthy and any slight indication that something might be off sends us into the dangerous world of internet searching. I did that dozens (o.k. THOUSANDS) of times. Abby is normal and baby Brown will be too! I was actually thinking of cancelling our trip back to Regina at Christmas because of that rash on Abby's neck. Moms will be Moms. ;)

at 9:31 AM Blogger Jules said...

I remember feeling the same way- so paranoid over nothing. I cried and cried sometimes, working myself up that there might be something wrong. There were times that I was certain something bad would happen.

Those irrational fears are 'normal' and it really doesnt sound like you actually have anything to worry about.
Your baby will be perfect, even if you forget to take your multivitamin every now and then, gain too much weight one week, or walked beside someone as they lit up a cigarette. You are already a wonderful mother for caring so much for your unborn baby girl.

at 9:33 AM Blogger Angella said...

Sometimes the Internet can be a dangerous thing...
The worry doesn't really stop with subsequent babies, but we know that God is in control.
Baby Brown will be perfect!

at 9:36 AM Blogger christy said...

There will never cease to be things tro worry about when you become a mommy. And you already are one. I have every confidence that your baby is perfect and healthy. Praise be to God that He's in control of forming your little girl. And that he loves her even more than you.
I love you. Hope to see you today.

I'm so excited you're having a girl.

at 10:48 AM Blogger karen said...

I hate internet research!!! I've made the same mistake, and wish I hadn't because all you read about is the bad stuff. And there is so much more good stuff to be thankful for. Baby Brown will be perfect and you won't believe how much you will love HER!! Talk about hearts exploding!!

at 11:53 AM Blogger Shelley said...

I have a few thoughts to share...

1) although ultrasound techs ARE knowledgeable, they are NOT doctors and therefore cannot diagnose.

2) just because something is on the internet, doesn't make it true. Try to NOT self-diagnose (or diagnose the babe), more times then not, when people read about symptoms of something, they suddenly "feel" as though they have them.

3) after working in maternity, i have heard of all the complications of pregnancy and childbirth and have seen the babes been born with perfection!

Babies are miraculous in themsevles. You would be amazed at what they can do inside the belly.
Little baby brown is well protected inside that whom of yours. And if that's not enough, just think that the GOd of the world is watching out for her also!!

at 1:41 PM Blogger KehlerGirl said...

I'm praying for that little baby of yours that she would be born healthy. But keep in mind that even if she isn't healthy, God still has a plan in mind for her. Things don't always go the way that we want them to go but we can't see the bigger picture either. Only God knows what life has in store for this little one growing inside you, and worrying won't change it.

at 5:20 PM Blogger Isabella said...

I sure hear ya on the paranoid part, it's the crazy part of the journey. Cry when you need to for sure. The worst part for me was near the end when you have to count the movements, I flipped out once a day! But, with all truthfulness that baby is yours and you and Steve will love it so much irregardless of it's perfections or imperfections. Just trust God to give you the "perfect" baby for you.

at 8:54 PM Blogger Elizabeth said...

I'm with the other ladies on finding anything to worry about.
Pregnancy is a time where you really learn to trust in God's plan. I'm praying for you guys. All will be well.

at 11:19 PM Blogger Danica said...

Being a parent can be so emotional. You always look back and think what was I getting my panties in a knot about? but then you turn around and worry and worry and fret about the next thing. It's what moms do. You're showing good healthy mommy worry signs. Good for you. I will be praying for all three of you.

at 8:43 AM Blogger Janice Vandyk said...

i was told the same thing about my ultrasound and when i went back a month later the markers were not there anymore.

at 9:28 AM Blogger Will said...

Try not to worry, or research too much. You can find info to support any fear on the internet but most of it doesn't apply to you or the baby. Trust your doctor and the ultrasound tech, everything will be ok.

at 10:30 AM Blogger Heidi said...

Choroid plexus cysts are very common and rarely mean anything. A follow up ultrasound will probably be done in a few weeks and they will be gone and your baby will be perfect. I'll be praying for you and your growing little girl.


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